Wednesday, August 4, 2010 / 7:40 PM
太多的夢想 太多的諾言;
I think now's the kind of time, where everything I do just seems to be going through the motions.
Today, I was... disconnected, numb. I don't know. But it was like, I wasn't really feeling anything? No anger, no sadness, no disappointment. And when I laughed, I didn't really get why I was laughing either, in a sense.
I walked around school, not really knowing where I wanted to go.
In class, I just did my work, what the chers told us to do.
cept for MrsC cos I just don't like her.
CCA, I wasn't sure what I was even supposed to be doing.
Layups round the court six times in a row? Maybe more.
Missed shots, missed cues, missed catches.
I wasn't thinking straight today.
Every move, every word, wasn't coming from me.
Simply put, it was like part of my brain switched off. To everything, and everybody.
If you asked me now, what happened in school, I probably could make a list.
But what I felt? What I thought about anything that went on around me?
Good luck with that.
Its like, tuesday is wednesday is thursday is friday.
With the only difference, being the timetable. Oh, and the To-Do list.
I'm tired.
If never wanting to wake up means you hate your life, and the world, or something of the sort.
Then whats not caring about whether you wake up or not?
Not really caring about what happens if I fail my PT, or live a life of solitude by scaring everyone I care about far far away.
Then would it be just my brain, switching off.
Or some part of me crashing, burning, dying?
God, I'm tired. Sleep, hell yes.
Labels: ramblings
