Wednesday, April 27, 2011 / 7:39 PM
想你 算是安慰還是悲哀。
There are times that you are going to realise. That you aren't what you think you are. You aren't as important as you think you are, you aren't going to get what you think you should be getting, you aren't going to be who you thought you'd be.
It's got a lot to do with the friend's you're with. Sometimes you're gonna think that maybe, maybe I can do it. Just maybe, they'll look at me and see what lies beneath. Then those same people will look at you and rather than seeing you for you, the only thing they see is the person you're standing next to. You're gonna be known as the friend of a friend, and you're gonna do nothing but add on to a particular image for that person. Sometimes, that fact is going to hurt. You never thought you'd end up like that, and you don't want to think that you're like that. But at the same time, you're not gonna lie to yourself. You know you're just a sidekick.
The thing is, you've got to know that it doesn't matter. I'd say that thats the most important thing. If you've ever, hated the feeling of being judged, taking on a role you despise, being less than who you wanted to be. If doesn't matter. You don't have to have it all. What makes you happy, find that one thing that makes you still believe that there are better things out there. You just haven't found it. You don't need all the attention, hog the limelight. Just that one moment of curtain call is enough to let that one person who really matters to see your face bathed in that momentary yet deserving light. That one moment, is what you need to grasp on to, and show that one person what they've found. One person's silent yet enduring cheer is worth more than thousands of applause that ends once the show is over.
Nothing can hurt you, you're the one who lets that happen.
You are who you are. You don't have to show the world that, just stay true and for sure. Sooner or later, someone out there will see you shine. And they will never, ever leave.
Sounds idealistic, doesn't it. But then I realised, it's happened.
因为一个人，我开始明白也相信了这些他坚持着的道理。
是他让我有信心接受一切的委屈，一切的质疑。他也曾经是一个被轻视的宝石。
现在，有越来越多人开始发现他其实有多好。从他的故事，我看见了自己。看见了自己的自卑和思想的错误。
Saturday, April 23, 2011 / 5:40 PM
I have to revive this place some time soon.
but when everything's in my little green notebook I'm just too lazy OTL.
Todays' flown by.
/ 5:37 PM
And if I ever do.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011 / 10:31 PM
他不在意，我们也不应该想这么多。
不管人家怎么想。他就是我们的黄鸿升。
不可否认，绝对无敌。
/ 10:08 PM
够了
我真的很气。也真的很不服，很无奈。
你们有什么资格批评他。凭什么说他烂，说他没有资格？
过了七年，你们还是一样的，这样子否定他。够了没？！他什么得罪了你，什么让你看不顺眼了？只因为他的了一项“罗志祥应该得到的奖”？ 我们知道他会是用怎么样的态度珍惜这份我们为他夺下的奖项，才会那么努力地投票。你们自己不投，就期待他得奖？没得到就说是内定的。这又有什么道理。
我知道他受了很多委屈。因为了解，才会心疼。
说真的，能够当个鬼迷真的是一件很幸福的事情。
有谁的偶像会说那样子肉麻恶心可爱嘴甜的话？又有谁的偶像会为了粉丝在机场签名，试着对每一位说上至少一句话，有问必答。真诚，坚强又可爱的黄鸿升。你们把他说成垃圾，我真的感到无奈。你们的不了解，就足以让你们从一件你们无理的觉得不公平的事件之后就批评他？
我也想算了，可是心里真的很为他感到不值。
但我们有能够做什么？只能像以往，默默地支持着我们的英雄。
我们知道他的好，就够了。
“如果不花心的定义是一生只能爱一个人，那我花惨了，因为我这么多歌迷，我好爱他们。”
谢谢你常常提醒我们，爱上你的理由。
Saturday, March 12, 2011 / 9:45 PM
Aftermaths.
The aftermaths keep coming.
They're dying down, but the damage is irreversible.
When the same thing happened, 7 years ago, I was terrified it would happen again. Yes, I was only 7 but I knew what happened, I knew how devastating it was, I knew how bad it was for everyone caught in the trap of disaster.
I hope things aren't as bad as they seem to be. I don't want catastrophe.
It's already happened though.
The death toll of Japan at 1300, and I highly doubt that number. The radiation leaks and everything that came as a result. The waves going on to other countries. The chain reaction.
and here we are still shopping for furniture.
when those people are picking in the rubble for anything they could possibly save.
Humanity, empathy. Whats it all supposed to mean?
Whats it all supposed to result in?
The most we could do is offer donations to aid and relief causes.
But those lives lost, whats 10 dollars to them?
I wish I could do more. Or have been there when everything came crashing down. I might have been able to do, however little, more to help those stranded in despair. Yeah, what a joke. whatamitosaythat.
When I first heard about it hitting Taiwan. I wasn't really sure how bad it was there but, the image of sheng's face appeared in my mind and I was so, scared. I was so afraid that he would be a victim in the fury of the waves and I imagined him going missing. I imagined something happening to him and this kind of really really raw fear struck me at the thought of losing him just like that. If we, if I, lost him in this horror, I really don't know how I would react. Cry. Scream. Lose control.
Nothing can ever happen to him, please. Thats what I thought.
All these, and more, flashed by me in the span of 5 seconds.
He was the first one who came into my mind at that moment of realising how bad it actually was.
But I knew he wasn't the only one.
Hundreds of bodies lying upon the ground. Like how it was in 2004.
All those lost hearts, fallen souls. Each and every one belonging in someone else's world. Each representing a surviving loved one leading a damaged life afterward. It must be so much worse than what I felt then. Of course it must, whats him to me compared to a family member to another? Minute. Insignificant. Infantile worry.
When will the aftermaths stop.
I don't think they ever will.
Labels: #prayforjapan, #prayfortheworld.
Friday, February 25, 2011 / 10:38 PM
So what happened to my determination to work harder this year. The promise to put aside temptations and other stuff standing in the way.
It's almost 11 and the work's undone.
